Teenage WastelandFacebook DONT'SMikaela Foster

Facebook is can be a wonderful place, but on the other hand, it can also be a place where people make themselves look like complete idiots. A reputation can be ruined forever with just one stupid post. Here are some absolute Facebook DONT’S.

1. DON’T put your new profile picture with the caption: “OMGGG I look soooo ugly in this pictureee :(” If you think you look horrible, why would you set it as your profile picture? You’re fishing for compliments, and it makes you look desperate.

2. DON’T exclude people. Everyone knows the feeling of being left out. If you and all of your friends are hanging out and one of your friends isn’t invited, don’t make a ton of posts saying how much fun you’re having, or post picures of you and your friends having “the best time everrrr!!!”. Better yet, did you know that this option was available?

I think this is a good way to make sure no one feels left out.

3. DON’T do status updates every 5 minutes explaining how much you hate your life and how miserable you are. If you need to talk it out, there is this amazing thing called “Chat”. Most likely you will have someone online that you can talk to about how much you hate life. Plus, you know that the mean boys in your class will “like” the status which will make you feel crappier. Of course you then have to make a new status complaining about that.

4. DON’T ask someone to hang out by writing it on their wall. “Hey, do you wanna go to the movies tomorrow? Call me!” or even worse updating your status to “Hey Kasie, do you wanna hang out? Call me!” Not only will it make some people feel left out, but it’s your personal business, and no-one really needs to know it. And no-one probably cares, anyway.

5. DON’T try to start a poke war with me. I do not want to be in a poke war with you. Please stop poking me.

Photo via Forbes (Then edited by Mikaela Foster)

  • http://www.facebook.com/tere.mascali Tere Layton Mascali

    Don’t friend your college age son…just don’t do it!

  • http://www.facebook.com/sshho Sophie Hayes Oatman

    you are unbelievably smart!!! an my twin! but you forgot one thing: don’t breaking up with people via FB… haha (:

  • http://www.facebook.com/carin.liela Carin Gannon

    why are you so smart?

  • http://www.facebook.com/jendelacruuuz Jen Delacruz

    Number 1 is so funny to me! Some girls update their status as “omgz I’m so fugly” when they’re just the opposite THEN change their default 50x a week.
    I use #2 a lot, myself! My ex-boyfriend’s girlfriend’s friends requested me, I’m guessing just to “keep tabs” seeing as she is insecure and wants to be cool with all of his exes — well at least that’s what he told me.

    Great post, girl! :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/jessica.broadbent1 Jessica Broadbent

    Mikaela, I just had to say that this post proves how super mature you are. I love your posts and always read them straight away when I see them.

    • http://www.facebook.com/jessica.broadbent1 Jessica Broadbent

      Er, just wanted to add that I only discovered Hello Giggles a week ago and I’m working through all the archives.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=541276966 Juli Potts

    My thing is posting pics of your food every day. I dont really care what your eating. Unless of course you’re using a company recipe or products! LOL.

  • http://www.facebook.com/kelsey.fort Kelsey Fort

    What a smart 12 year old!! Gosh some people wayyy older can’t even figure simple things like these out!

    • Anonymous

      I’d vnretue that this article has saved me more time than any other.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1060550697 Laura Mayaneli Brown

    Dearest Mikaela,
    I love the intelligence you have for your age. I mean I know you’ve probably read it a million times, but I’m glad you have this blog! Anyways, now that is out of the way..
    I agree to the fullest extent. Sometimes I feel like I want to scream at someone just because I know they are committing these crimes (as listed above), but I know that it would lower their self esteem that much more.
    I would add a couple more rules though:
    1. There is no need to constantly send Farmville requests when you hardly know a person. We know you’re trying to maintain a fabulous farm but, seriously?
    2. Describing in DETAIL what went wrong with your relationship. Especially when you’re friends with them. This is just morally incorrect. Now everyone knows your life. Sorrrrrrrry :/
    3. Don’t put anything such as half nude photos, cursing, etc. that you will eventually be ashamed of. Who knows who’s looking at your profile in the future. It could be the boss who determines the rest of your successful life until they see the horrifying pictures you posted. Everything that is posted on the internet, can eventually be found. Just sayin’

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=821634827 Andrea Maramara

    i have to use #2 with my aunt all the time cuz she’s a lil’ bit gossip

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1386805767 Raquel Lupe Anaya

    I feel the need to mention the “hide” button, I reserve this for A) preachers (no, not men of the cloth, but anyone really who uses their status updates to clog up my news feed about whatever it is they’re promoting) and B) Happy Couples. VERY happy couples. Its almost like PDA but over the internet which is kind of more intrusive. I don’t openly stare at couples out together in public (even if I really CAN’T believe they’re doing that HERE!) but you know, you start reading and in the middle of the sentence you realize that ‘oh no pookie bear has a stomach ache’ or ‘x loves z soooooo much’. Some things should be kept private, haha if people can’t censor themselves, do it for them!

  • http://www.facebook.com/claudia.gelabert1 Claudia Gelabert

    smart post.

    p.s. i somehow hate the “i love my life” status updates just as much as #3 kind

  • http://www.facebook.com/hellothisisanna Anna Johnson

    To add to #3… maybe if people were out doing something and not sitting on their computer, they wouldn’t think their life was so miserable and wouldn’t have such an opportunity to post about it! Right?

    You are a wise girl, Mikaela!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001047910603 Trina Chowdhury

    #4 and #5 are stupid. How would your ‘rep’ be ruined by simply asking someone to hang out on a wall? What’s the wall for anyway? Oh and not everyone dislikes poke wars. Starting one with random people is one thing but with someone you know who doesn’t have a grumpy personality it’s perfectly alright. You’re trying too hard to seem mature sweetheart.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=23403621 Danielle Curtis

      Sweetheart, you’re trying a little too hard to condescend to a 12 year old. The exact opposite of mature.

  • http://www.facebook.com/pinkgrapefruits87 Lauren Nespoli

    2. I had no idea that was an option! I don’t think I like that; I don’t wanna be excluded, haha.
    3. People really need to read that one! And not just teenagers; people I’m friends with on Facebook who are my age or older could definitely benefit from reading this, haha.

  • http://www.facebook.com/blueevey Evelyn Sue Sandoval

    aren’t you a bit too young to actually have a facebook? here’s the link:

    http://www.facebook.com/help/?faq=210644045634222

    everyone lies about their age, i get that, i just don’t think hellogiggles should be encouraging it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=624235565 Christy Weiss

    I love the ” hide from” feature especially when I want to status I’m hiding from work. Sadly accepted a friend request from a coworker who later became a boss.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1488459097 Sarah Baker

    You’re only 12 and yet so much smarter than my 20 year old peers. Kudos to you girl! =)

  • http://www.facebook.com/CutiebugCreations Lauren Vaughan

    4- i agree that you shouldn’t post hanging out w- people on your status, it does seem like you’re simply fishing for attention and whatnot. however, writing on the person”s wall is perfectly acceptable. what else is writing on someone’s fb wall for??

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001047910603 Trina Chowdhury

      I agree. People who put it as their status really are looking for attention.

  • http://www.facebook.com/jvanalstyne Joseph Van Alstyne

    Though I guess if you don’t have somebody’s number or don’t have a cellphone, #4 is sort of whatevs.

  • http://www.facebook.com/jvanalstyne Joseph Van Alstyne

    I have to use #2 to my advantage a lot. There’s this friend, who I’m not even sure why I have as a friend, who invites himself to things a lot if he is left out. So it’s better he just doesn’t know.

    And I agree on #4, Mikaela. That’s what texting is for. lol

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