— EINTKILF

Everything I Need to Know, I Learned From Ellen DeGeneres

I am not even going to pretend to lie to you guys and try to talk about anything else besides the Oscars®. They are on in mere days, people. Days. This is what I live for each year and I am so excited and also simultaneously so depressed that they are soon to be over. But let’s not focus on that just yet.

As I am in the habit of doing now, apparently, I would like to pay a little homage to our wonderful host of the 86th Academy Awards®, the highlight of all of our lives, Ellen DeGeneres. I love Ellen for a lot of reasons. She is smart and funny and kind, and she changed her cover photo on Facebook to a picture of her and Leonardo DiCaprio. She is basically perfect, and I believe wholeheartedly that we all have, or at least should, learn a lot from this woman.

EINTKILF Ellen DeGeneres

1. Dancing makes the world go ’round.
If you have never seen Ellen bust some moves, you have never seen her show, or commercials with Ellen in them, or anything, and if that’s the case, what is wrong with you?. Ellen has natural soul. Her dance moves come easily and to any kind of music, but best of all, she has the keen ability to get anyone to dance with her.

I mean, she even got President Obama to dance with her. I know he likes to dance as well, but that is still a pretty rad accomplishment in my mind. 

2. Self-confidence is key.

This sounds like something I say to myself often, and I wish I was kidding, but I am not.

3. In fact, music is vital.

Ellen has a great sidekick of a DJ on her show called Tony Okungbowa. He plays the music for her to dance along with, and he always does a stellar job. Besides that though, Ellen’s audience can always tell how genuine she is in her interest and love for all of the different music genres. As a talk show host, Ellen obviously has a wide array of musical guests, from Kanye to Taylor Swift to child prodigies singing well-known songs or playing their own music. Regardless of what it is, Ellen loves it. Music makes the people come together. Yeah.

4. Children are our future.
Speaking of child prodigies, Ellen has seen her fair share of extremely talented children. As I said before, sometimes they sing or play music, and sometimes they dance, and sometimes they do everything like dear Rosie and Sophia Grace.

I still cry when I watch this clip for some reason. Is that normal? Regardless, I love children, and I love that Ellen loves children, and these girls truly deserve all of the attention they have received since their first time on the air.

5. Love the one you are with.

I mean… it does not get better than Ellen’s relationship with Portia De Rossi. It just does not get better than that. I read an interview with Ellen a few years ago about her reflection on her former relationship with Anne Heche. The heartbreak of a learning experience that came from Heche and Ellen’s relationship ending always really stuck with me. Through my first breakup, I thought of the reflection Ellen had toward her own “first time” she had had her heart broken. For whatever reason, I felt so connected to Ellen’s words, and seeing her rise from such a dark place, out of a sad and lonely breakup, to find love with her beautiful wife… nothing makes me happier. Good people deserve good people, and these are good people.


Also, De Rossi’s character was my favorite on Ally McBeal, so like… bonus points. And in case you are wondering, there is absolutely no truth to the divorce rumors.

Ellen: There’s not one ounce of truth to any of it, I am very happily married. In fact, the only thing we ever argue about is who loves who more. It really is true.

Bawwwww.

6. No one needs boys

Taylor: I like, for real, don’t have a boyfriend. I don’t even have, like kind of a boyfriend. I don’t have someone I’m texting that is a guy that someday might be my boyfriend. There is nothing going on right now.
Ellen: That’s pathetic.

Of course, Ellen goes on to tell Miss Swift, and the rest of the world, that no one needs boys. “Take it from me,” she quipped.

7. How to be funny.

Ellen: Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else’s expense and I find that’s just a form of bullying. I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind and make people laugh without hurting somebody else’s feelings.

Though I must admit that I think “mean humor” (like pranks and mocking your friends and stuff) is really funny, I wholeheartedly agree with Ellen’s comment. This is probably why I watch stand-up like Ellen and Steve Martin, not Daniel Tosh (gag) or Dane Cook.

8. Laughter is the best medicine.

Ellen hosted the 2001 Emmy Awards right after September 11th, which was an incredibly difficult task, I am sure. The award show was rescheduled twice, ultimately airing at the same time as the World Series. The entire opening monologue was flawless. Ellen handled herself perfectly, mercilessly mocking the show’s indecision to finally air, the baseball game, television executives, and yes, even 9/11.

Ellen: I feel like I’m in a unique position as host, because think about it — what would bug the Taliban more than seeing a gay woman in a suit surrounded by Jews?

Years later in 2005, Ellen hosted the Emmys again, but this time the show aired right after Hurricane Katrina. As we can always expect from Ellen, she handled the show with the utmost level of class and humor, proving that truly, laughter cures all.

Ellen: New Orleans is my hometown and I have family in Mississippi; our thoughts and prayers go out to everyone affected. I guess I don’t have to point out that this is the second time that I’ve hosted the Emmys after a national tragedy and I just want to say that I’m honored. Because it’s times like this that we really, really need laughter. And be sure to look for me next month when I host the North Korean People’s Choice Awards.

9. Stay positive.

I can only imagine that even when Ellen herself cannot imagine how she would stay positive in a really dark place, having guests like Talia Castellano probably reminds her.

(I’m all emotional now.)

In case you missed it, Castellano, who was a good friend of Ellen’s, as well as an honorary Covergirl, passed away this past June. Ellen has an incredible talent for finding inspirational real life human beings to introduce the world to. And for that, I am forever grateful.

10. It really does get better.

After yet another teenager committed suicide after being bullied for coming out as gay, Ellen took a very somber moment on her show to discuss the unacceptability of the reality of these situations.

Ellen: These kids needed us, and we have an obligation to change this. There are messages everywhere that validate this kind of bullying and taunting and we have to make it stop. We can’t let intolerance and ignorance take another kid’s life, and I want anyone out there who feels different and alone that I know how you feel. And there is help out there, and you can find support in your community…

…Things will get easier, people’s mind will change, and you should be alive to see it.

Bless her loving soul. <3

Thank you, Ellen. For being a huge inspiration, a wonderful person, a hilarious ball of energy and really, really, really… thank you for hosting this year’s show. I couldn’t be more excited!

(Also, my mom is, like, the biggest Ellen fan in the world, so I’m saying hi to Ellen for her.)

Featured image via , Taylor Swift image via blog.zap2it, Dory image via cdnpix

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