Queen of the Day Emma Stone Tries to Put an End to Self Body Shaming Laura Donovan

For most of my life, I’ve been considered “too skinny” by adults and peers alike. In middle school, people joked that I had an eating disorder, which was unpleasant to hear but better than being called overweight, I told myself. Then came college and with it came the inevitable body changes of drastic lifestyle shifting, growing up, studying abroad and moving out of my mom’s place. When I returned home at the end of one summer, a grown male neighbor took it upon himself to point out my significant weight gain, which I was supposed to take as a compliment because I’d been “too thin” all those years anyway. I was instructed to thank the guy, but all I wanted to do was strangle him on his own lawn.

When it comes to appearance, nobody is safe from criticism, and life savant Emma Stone unfortunately knows all about this. In a new interview with USA Today, the Arizona native covers a lot of ground and reveals she’s read tons of nasty remarks on her figure, “I firmly believe that nothing really affects you or can really bother you if you don’t already feel that way about yourself. I’ve seen a lot of comments that say, ‘Eat a sandwich’ or ‘She looks sick.’ I’ve been looking at myself in the mirror being mean to myself. I’m not sick. I eat sandwiches.”

Stone expresses concern that people think she’s sending a bad message to the world about her consumption habits, even though her petite frame has nothing to do with the way she’s been eating, “In no way is it my intention to be a bad example. That has been kind of bothering me lately. I’ve shamed myself for it. We shame each other online. We’re always too skinny or too fat or too tall or too short. They’re just confirming this feeling I have about myself. I’m trying to figure my body out. It bothers me because I care so much about young girls. We’re shaming each other and we’re shaming ourselves, and it sucks.”

Yeah, it really does, and I’m not afraid to say the “real women have curves” movement is part of the problem. All women are real women, and being shamed for thinness can be just as damaging as getting laughed at for putting on weight. It’s important to remember that body criticism of any kind can stick with a person for the rest of his or her life, especially if that individual is already insecure. That’s why Stone doesn’t want to spend her time picking apart somebody else’s looks, and good on her for making that healthy decision:

“When I make a comment about someone or I choose to gossip about someone and speculate about their body or their life or their face, it’s usually a reflection of something I’m feeling myself. That has become ingrained in me. I’m trying to eliminate gossip from my own life.”

I think this is something we can all work on, myself included. When Stone talks about others publicly, it’s in a positive light, and that’s how she describes fellow a-list lady Shailene Woodley, “She feels good about herself. I like being around women like that.”

I do too, and that’s why there’s a need for more Emma Stones in our world.

Please share your thoughts on the effects of body shaming in the comments section.

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  1. Why do women insist on bitching about the figures and appearances of other women, when usually they have insecurities of their own. It frustrates me when I hear of girls making comments like “She needs to eat something, she’s so skinny!” and “Wow, she’s put on a few pounds lately.” when we all would hate that to be said of ourselves. There is no “perfect body”, it’s a myth! We are born with our own noses, our own hips, our own boobs, and as long as we’re happy and healthy, it doesn’t matter if we fit into a size 0 or a size 18. I firmly believe that for us to love ourselves, we need to love each other! We must ditch the bitchiness as a gender! C’mon girls! Negative body image comes from other women, so let’s not be those women :)

  2. I really enjoyed reading this piece. As a ‘curvy’ woman myself, I always inwardly cringe when I see the “Real women have curves!” bit in memes and whatnot. It’s meant to be empowering, but it’s actually demeaning in that it reduces us to the sum of our various body parts, when realistically, our parts are nothing more than the vehicle by which we move through life. I am NOT my fat ass and I am NOT my big feet or my dimpled thighs. I am so much more than that and so is every other human being. We should be judged on what we do and how we love and how we inspire others to love, not by our appearance. It’s sad that this is the standard by which we measure our worth, and by body shaming one another, we not only allow this, but encourage it.

  3. What a great post! :) As someone who’s been extremely thin & unable to gain weight for years (coupled with a chronic, fairly debilitating illness the past few), I certainly can relate to what you, Emma, & other commenters have said. Regardless of what someone looks like on the outside, you never really know what someone’s dealing with on the inside that could potentially be affecting both how they view their inner & outside beauty, unless you ask/know them right? I really just like to think that ALL of us are women – that what you look like on the outside doesn’t determine your “womanliness.” <3

  4. Instead of shaming each other for either not fitting the “ideal” body type — whatever we happen to think that is — we should start focusing on what we like about each other instead. Guaranteed every since women, no matter how body conscious she is, she has at least one feature she loves. Focusing on that has helped with me with body acceptance (though I still struggle with it).

    For example, when I start hating on myself for gaining weight, I think about my boobs. Honestly, they are my favorite body part and if I were super skinny, I wouldn’t have them. Same goes for thin girls- from great arms to flat tummies, I’m sure there are features that you have that you think are great.

    Maybe it’s something that has nothing to do with weight at all. Maybe you like your hands or your face or your hair. Whatever it is, shift your focus there. And do the same for your fellow females :)

  5. When I saw Emma Stone in person a year and a half ago, I was shocked at how thin she was. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a person so thin. The camera really does add 10 pounds, and for a while after that I was really skeptical whenever I heard her preach body love because she had clearly, at least I thought, dropped to a dangerously low weight to fit into Hollywood beauty standards. But after reading this I realized I have been quick to judge, and I am glad Emma Stone opened up about her own body insecurities- something nobody should have because everyone is beautiful in their own way, but we are all allowed to have, regardless of how “perfect” someone may seem.

  6. I often get offended when friends make comments about my body. I am of the understanding that in no way is it anyones right to call out another’s physique. I recently had a person post on my facebook “Bones are for dogs, real men want meat.” with a picture. It upset me. My lovely significant other replied with “I am not a dog and real men don’t let others tell them what they want.” The real shame is that people have succumbed to hurting others to feel okay. We each have our own insecurities; we do not need them pointed out.

  7. I never heard the end of oh your fat altho in my youth I really wasn’t I look back at my size 8/10 body of my teen years and miss it. I was tortured with names like alli-whaly, sitting at the pool side I heard look a beached whale. It stuck with me. A friend of mine suffered with inability to gain weight the odd couple I guess you can say. I totally agree body shaming only makes it worse. If all the hateful people saw me now their words would be more crule to my size 20 body. Non knowing or caring about the health hell that put me there. Thin or fluffy, tall or short you are beautiful and your body the way it is fits you perfect! Feed it healthy foods, run and play, breath deep and relax. The rest will work to what you are meant to be! :-)

  8. I’ve been bullied like hell my whole life for “being freakishly thin” and it went as far as people saying I did coke during my freshman and sophomore years. I’m glad Emma admits these things and I’m glad that someone brought up that bs “real women have curves”. That’s is ALSO body shaming and bullying wether you want to believe or not. I’m fine with my body and I accept it the way it is and so should everyone else. My body is no one else’s problem or business but mine!

    Ladies of someone is thinner than you don’t make weird comments about “how lucky” they are of “OMG how can you eat all that and not gain weight?!”. It’s rude to make comments on someone’s eating habits or body type. It’s not a compliment at all.

  9. This is an issue that doesn’t receive nearly enough attention, because when it’s talked about it seems as though thin girls are just whining about being skinny, though that is not even nearly the case. “Skinny shaming” is a real and damaging issue. It is thought that girls and women who are thin shouldn’t have body issues because they already have the bodies that many women strive for. Therefore, other girls and women think that it is acceptable to analyze the bodies of those who are thin, but this simply perpetuates self-consciousness and body anxiety.

    • “It is thought that girls and women who are thin shouldn’t have body issues because they already have the bodies that many women strive for. Therefore, other girls and women think that it is acceptable to analyze the bodies of those who are thin, but this simply perpetuates self-consciousness and body anxiety.” It’s also insane to assume thin people have it all figured out. Nope, it doesn’t work that way.

      Laura Donovan | 5/06/2014 03:05 pm
  10. The “real women have curves” movement is good, but I agree there should be a broader representation of what a real woman is. We’re all different, and we really do need to stop the self and peer shaming that’s so prevalent. As a teen, I was skinny and flat chested (no matter how much food I devoured) and was equally embarrassed to don my gymnastics tights as some of my friends who felt chubby. It’s hard to love our bodies and we’re just making it that much harder on each other.

    • Totally. I don’t want to be told I’m not a woman because I’m not super curvy. So true: “It’s hard to love our bodies and we’re just making it that much harder on each other.”

      Laura Donovan | 5/06/2014 03:05 pm
  11. I get it. But when I hear “Wahh, I’m so skinny,” I don’t feel sympathy. It’s not Emma Stone’s fault that society shames women because they don’t look like her. But that’s the reality. And so, women like Stone take the blame for it. It’s not right, but the problem doesn’t lie within “curvy” women.

    • The problem lies within the shaming of thinner women that’s inside that statement. It’s not right to shame anyone’s body.

    • No one here is saying “wah I’m so skinny.” It’s no one’s business what Emma Stone looks like and it’s no one’s place to tell her to eat a sandwich,

      Laura Donovan | 5/06/2014 03:05 pm
  12. What a great feminist statement made by Ms. Stone. Maybe her positive attitude will catch on with other Hollywood types, but probably not. And maybe Ms. Woodley will realize what being a strong feminist means as well.

  13. Being told that I was fat was part of my daily life growing up… I didn’t play sports, I hate competition… I see no point in showing people that they are not fast enough, strong enough, or good enough to beat someone else… What does that show us? And what is enough, anyway? I never dieted… And then one day, I was curvy… Though I weighed more than what was “acceptable” it wasn’t perceptible. Somehow my stomach was flat with an hourglass-esque figure to go along with it. Yet these girls that dieted, and tried so hard to fit the societal “standard of beauty” are now chubby, or flat out obese… Those early pubescent years are stricktly for the changing of our bodies… Instead of dieting, or shaming ourselves and others, why don’t we just let our bodies finish doing what they’re made to do? Make sure you’re active, and get the appropriate nutrition, and things will work out just fine.

    • Sorry you went through all of that :(

      Laura Donovan | 5/06/2014 03:05 pm
      • It’s no worries, I’m stronger for it. Not to mention I’m proud to be an “Amazonian”. I have no dislike for the skinnier girls, I just believe we should all be more proud of who we are, and let nature take its course…

  14. I wrote such a long reply and the site didn’t work.

    I’ll make it short, I like this site, I don’t feel represented by “real women” images cos they are usually just larger women,some of us aren’t a 0 size neither an XXL. I’d like for all of us to include and respect each other.

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