E-motions – When The Internet Isn't Cute by Paige Baker

I spend most of my life online, and have found it to be a (mostly) positive place. I’m always reading blogs written by these cute girls in their Anthropologie dresses about “Omg, u guyz. Still have mad luv 4 the Interwebz. Y’all r 2 kewt.”

And for the most part–I agree. Y’all ARE 2 kewt. But what about the other 2.8% of the time you’re online? When you get on facebook and you want to spend hours going through your home page commenting “H8 u” on every post, and only tweet “CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES. I’VE REACHED MY LAST RESORT. SUFFOCATION. NO BREATHING. DON’T GIVE A F— IF I CUT MY ARMS BLEEDING” (Papa Roach was never cool, if nothing else, I hope know you know that).

I’ve thought a lot about why we reach this point (besides, you know, PMS) and have narrowed it down to the three most logical explanations.

1. Jealousy – The Internet creates a whole new world (You’re welcome. That will be stuck in your head for the next three years) to be jealous of. A world where it is literally impossible not to see people successfully living the life you wish you had, multiple times daily.

2. Insecurity – In real, non-LCD life, when you say something to someone, you generally receive a response (if not, I suggest you find some new friends. I’m @vpbaker, or whatever) but online, things can get a little more sticky. Sometimes you tweet something totally brilliant and it doesn’t get Fav’d, RT’d, or even @replied by that creepy 68 year-old guy who follows you for some unfortunate reason. There is a petty amount of self-defeat that comes with that, and consequently, “h8 u” is sometimes all that can be said, afterward.

3. Everyone Else in the Whole World is Stupid, and You’re Really Smart, and Beautiful, and You Should Really Have a Husband Or At Least a Reality Show, Because Gaaawd, Have you Met Yourself? – Lastly, sometimes you just have to face facts, and see that no one “gets” you the way you do. And it’s not you–it’s them (obvi). That’s okay too, because, you know, you’ve just got to keep doing you.

Photo via ImperfectWomen.com

Paige Baker is currently a student of academics and the world. Find her on Twitter as @vpbaker and on her blog Fragment: Consider Revising.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1121880172 Kristen Hull

    I suffer from all of these every now and then. Number three the most often because no one understands how fabulous I am!!!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000501203123 Alli Woods Frederick

    It’s just a shame that the jealousy people feel is over nothing. People (typically) put their “super-selves” out there for public consumption. Everyone, and I do mean EVERYONE, has their crap days and problems in their lives.
    Comparing your real-life to people’s on-life personas is like comparing your body to Barbie’s. It’s real life versus idealized life. what you see online is not what you actually get.
    If more people would realize that fact, there would be a lost less hatin’ and a lot more lovin’.

    • http://www.facebook.com/vpaige.baker Paige Baker

      Yes! I couldn’t agree any more. I find that, especially in mom blogs, to be the case. No one wants to look like a bad mom, who doesn’t love their baby enough–just because everything isn’t always pretty. I think that’s both one of the most important, and most difficult things to remember, online.

  • http://www.facebook.com/danihampton Danielle Hampton

    Oh Paige I love this. And you.

    • http://www.facebook.com/vpaige.baker Paige Baker

      I obviously love you forever, Dani. Hello.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ashley.lynn.cook Ashley Lynn Cook

    #1 & #2…amen lol this article is brilliant, thanks paige!

  • http://www.facebook.com/brittany.comas Brittany Comas

    I LOVE this. Too much. I always think I need my own reality show…

  • http://www.facebook.com/pinkgrapefruits87 Lauren Nespoli

    I love this article! It’s very true. I can definitely relate to #1 and #2.

  • http://www.facebook.com/youremyheartkid Heather St Clair

    I love this so much.

  • http://www.facebook.com/pammy.smith.strassburg Pammy Smith Strassburg

    Yes and Yes. I am always wondering, “WHY hasn’t anyone “liked” my hilarious Facebook post yet? It was brilliant!” But for realz, people constantly tell my husband and I that we should have our own reality show.. So WHY don’t we then, Gosh!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1060550697 Laura Mayaneli Brown

    I totes agree. Thank you for putting this out for everyone to hear (or read rather), and come to the realization on what the internet dawns upon all of us. Also, thanks for the cool disney song to be stuck in my head for hours to come!;)

Need more Giggles?
Like us on Facebook!

Want more Giggles?
Sign up for our newsletter!