“Every day is ugly sweater contest day for me.” -@VABoredWoolf

“I hope that, when I die, a montage of all the pizzas I’ve loved flashes before my eyes.” -@KerryAnn

“Spooning ice cream > Spooning people” -@theBrookofFarah

“Put on my best sweatpants in case the pizza delivery guy is hot.”-@MiniestMaus

“Haven’t had any interactions in a while. Good thing I’m not a Tamagotchi or I’d be dead” -@WatsonHoney

“I can’t find a Hanukkah emoji and I’m not happy about it!”-@Sofifii

“Fictional people’s problems are keeping me up at night.”-@SaraThomas84

“When will I ever learn that studying in my bed under my covers will get me absolutely nowhere?” – @M0RGANTR0N