Comments on: “But You Have Such A Pretty Face!” And Other Things You Should Stop Saying To Your Fat Friends

By: Lisa Lumpkin

Lisa Lumpkin — Wed, 12 Sep 2012 23:42:41 +0000

Yes ma’am. This. It’s a long road and due to health issues, I keep going back and forth. But, I’m always fat. and 75% of the time, I’m 80% okay with it. Thank you.

By: Kathryn Lederer

Kathryn Lederer — Tue, 11 Sep 2012 12:14:01 +0000

i feel that people need to not comment on physical appearance at all. i always feel uncomfortable when people comment on my appearance, regardless of how nice the remark is. i would rather someone compliment my intellect, sense of humor or my fab sense of style;) those are qualities i have cultivated, unlike my pretty eyes or double ds ha

By: Maggie Voorhees

Maggie Voorhees — Thu, 06 Sep 2012 12:17:48 +0000

“For now though, life is so much easier when I embrace the body that I have, love it, take care of it, and just keep doin’ me.”

I love this…It is such an amazing reminder…I’ve struggled with body image since a very young age. And I’ve finally begun loving my body. It’s kinda great to know that other girls have felt this way, and have such a positive view about themselves now. Thanks for writing this

By: Ramou Sarr

Ramou Sarr — Wed, 05 Sep 2012 12:52:50 +0000

But if it doesn’t take much effort to not do something after someone’s said, “Hey, this kind of bothers me,” then why not put that minimal effort in, you know?

By: Marcela Carranza

Marcela Carranza — Wed, 05 Sep 2012 06:22:20 +0000

I totally get you, the worst “compliment” I`ve got was by my doctor; one day my mother basically dragged myself to go see an endocrinologist, since she thought i might have some sort of disease (sorry i forgot the name for it XD) that was making me gain even more weight. Well after assuring my mother that I was not sick, he completely went 180 and started shaming me on being overweight telling me that I would have the hardest time ever getting a boyfriend and basically that i was going to be jobless, friendless and lonely for life and then he ended up saying but you have such a pretty face and more empty compliments and comments about how great my life is going to be when I finally lose all that extra fat. Like literally everything in my life is going to magically fix itself just because I lost some weight.
Funny how sometimes those who are supposed to help end up doing exactly the opposite. The good thing is that I had already figured out my own reasons to lose weight and also my own terms of doing it, so I wasn’t completely ambushed by the doctor’s words and I have a realistic expectation of what is going to happen afterwards.
I would be lying if I told you i didn’t got upset or that i dont stress over it from time to time but I try not to pressure myself to lose weight quickly and pay no attention to my friends weight obsessions which is mostly directed at themselves but kind of hit close to home, and is sometimes unbearable in the sense that weigh loss is in nearly every freaking conversation we have as a group.
I don’t want my life to be revolving around losing weight and sometimes it seems that is what’s expected off fat people and women in general and when it’s not some of the people around you seem eager to remind you on a councious or uncouncious way, and excusing or trying to redeem themselves once they aknowledged what they’ve done, with compliments or giving false expectations about how fantastic everything is going to be after the weight loss.

By: Emily Ciara Riffle

Emily Ciara Riffle — Wed, 05 Sep 2012 02:49:20 +0000

I don’t think Christin was body shaming. I was just agreeing with the comment that Amanda made about body shaming going both ways. It is annoying for especially skinny girls to complain about being fat. But everyone has a self-conscious issue. And some of these girls could have an eating disorder or other mental health problem that makes them see themselves as such. Anyway, this is extremely off topic. I think that everyone should just be happy with the body they have. tweak it as you see fit, but don’t hate it, and don’t shame other women. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. I truly believe that with all of my heart.

By: Ramou Sarr

Ramou Sarr — Wed, 05 Sep 2012 02:32:06 +0000

I don’t think that Christin was body shaming her co-worker, just pointing out the ridiculousness of a woman who has trouble finding an XS that fits her calling herself fat – because fat isn’t a feeling. Body shaming does extend to all bodies, but there is this stigma and fear and public shaming that is particularly prevalent when it comes to bigger bodies.

By: Kirsten Zoe Hyer

Kirsten Zoe Hyer — Wed, 05 Sep 2012 02:31:36 +0000

I’m good with my body. It is what it is, and my metabolism and craving for oreos, cake and cookie butter in one sitting are God given yes they are. I dress fabulously in clothes that fit and flatter, and my confidence rocks the world.

But I know, all the while, that my Fibromyalgia, which causes my living agony would be so much better if I lost so much weight. And that sits in the back of my mind. And thats a thought, that no amount of charm can over run.