The Most Bizarre and Weirdly Adorable Swimsuits, EverGina Vaynshteyn

Right now, if you buy any magazine from any shelf, you are bound to flip to the page where they they tell you which swimsuit is the perfect swimsuit for your body type. If you’re athletic, a bandeau ring-top will surely be flattering. If you’ve got a big booty, then a string style will compliment your gorgeous bod. Lanky? Try a ruffled two-piece. This is helpful and all, but I bet fashion magazines never considered these eclectic pieces, which probably compliment every single body type because they’re so freaking awesome (and some are just weird, but hey!).

1. Shark Swimsuit

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Sharks are terrifying, but this swimsuit is kind of adorable. Not feeling a two-piece, nor a one-piece? Try these jaws on for size.

2. Bear swimsuit

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Want to scare off all the kids at the community pool? Just slip on this swimsuit and let it do the growling for you.

3. Puppy swimsuit

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AWWW PUPPIES. ON YOUR SWIMSUIT. This is swimwear for all the puppy fans out there.

4. “Dem Guts” swimsuit

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This swimsuit by Black Milk Clothing is seriously all the rage right now. And by “rage” I mean “WOW THAT’S DISGUSTING GET THAT AWAY FROM MY BODY,” or “Whoa! That’s so meta and cool! I must have it!” You can actually buy yours here for $90 if it’s not sold out. They’re made to order, so if you want one, you better get shopping!

5. Shark vs. Little Mermaid Swimsuit

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Well, this swimsuit is certainly not for the faint of heart. Poor Ariel is getting hunted down by a horrific and bloodthirsty shark.

6. The…Lady Gaga Swimsuit?

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Is that a built-in floatie? Why is it spiked? Something tells me, this suit is not water-friendly, or friendly at all for that matter.

7. The Runway Swimsuit

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If you are looking for a swimsuit that doesn’t leave your body striped with glaring tan-lines, this suit is not for you.

8. Fishy Swimsuit

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I think someone thought to themselves, “seashells for a bikini top? I can do better than THAT!” And then they went ahead and designed this puffer fish bikini top. With fringe because, let’s not go overboard or anything.

9. Lumpy Space Princess Swimsuit

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OH. MY. GLOB. I must confess to you guys, I’m considering actually buying this Adventure Time swimsuit once more become available in my size. Just look at it. It’s glorious and everything we ever dreamed of.

10. Scary Joker Swimsuit

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Well, if you didn’t feel like buying your standard “sexy” bikini from the Victoria’s Secret catalog this year, you could always go the villain route and support the Joker. And scare away little children in the process. Some people just want to watch the world burn. Sigh.

 

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