Dear People Who Do Civil War Reenactments,
So uh, what’s that like? You just like, get dressed up in your 1860s best and fight other dudes who are dressed up in their 1860s best and you’re all posting Facebook status updates like “Let’s crush those Union communist socialist Marxists all the way to Massachusetts!” (I may be getting my wartime social movements confused) and taking TwitPics of your friends in battle?
I don’t mean to make fun, I just don’t actually believe Civil War Reenactments are a real thing, I think they are a made up thing that we see in movies to give wacky sidekick characters strange hobbies. Other strange and possibly made-up movie hobbies could include (but are not limited to):
- CosPlay (which could be the same thing as LARPing I’m not sure)
- needlepoint clubs
- stamp collecting
- being an architect
- Renaissance Faire-Going
- stalking people
- Drinking a glass of wine in a bubble bath
- keeping a food diary
I mean these aren’t things people do in real life. Like Civil War Reenactments. We just think it’s true because we all saw Sweet Home Alabama and everyone remembers that scene when Reese Witherspoon interrupts the Civil War Reenactment!
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t want Civil War Reenactments to exist, it’s just I’ve never met any of you who actually partake. It sounds marvelous, in fact. See, I’m really into historical things right now because I’ve been watching that show Downton Abbey and it’s really spiraled into an obsessive hobby for me (see, that is something people do for a hobby; obsess over television and then watch lots of television and only talk about television — let’s see a character in a movie do that! Actually let’s not, that’s boring. Okay, I get it now).
What happens if you are someone who does Civil War Reenactments and you have to be one of the people fighting for the South and then that means you are fighting for slavery don’t you feel terrible about yourself then I mean honestly how do you go on?
Anyway if you or someone close to you participates in Civil War Reenactments I have a lot of questions.
Civil War Reenactment photo via ShutterStock