Here’s another exciting trend that keeps reappearing in my online dating inbox: dudes who write me and start off their introduction with either a backhanded compliment or a flat out insult. I guess it takes a W&C brain to rationalize that the best approach to striking up an online conversation with someone you find interesting is by insulting her at the start. It’s like that thing adults tell little kids…that if a boy is mean to a girl in school or vice versa, it’s not that they are being jerks, it means they like you. This explanation is, as we all know, basically a lie to cover up small children’s bad behavior in order to make the picked on feel better. Well, it seems that these gentlemen callers never quite learned that truth and took the childhood lesson to heart. Let’s call it the “5-year-old’s approach” to online wooing. And yes, that is just as unappealing as it sounds. Gigglers, what do you think? Has being insulted by a potential date ever worked on any woman, anywhere?
Insult Email #1 – Subject: You….
So you either sound like one of the coolest girls on here…or a complete nut case. I’m interested in finding out which
Insult Email #2 – Subject: Hi
You write in completely too long run-on sentences overrun with unnecessary adjectives, pronouns, and prepositions. Hey, you did say “raddest traits.” I don’t think those two words have been used in a phrase by anyone…ever.
Insult Email #3 – Subject: (none)
I like your profile. You might be kind of humorous.
Insult Email #4 – Subject: Hi
I am a shrink…. I can Help
Insult Email #5 - Subject: Hey Loser
you gonna stop yelling? and what’s wrong with a simple hello, lol. Thought i give you a message since your not bad looking. You seem like fun. What’s up?