Part 1 of this story can be found here.
How does one tell the people she is closest to that there is a little person growing inside of her? It’s certainly not news I’d ever had to share before, and I was afraid that my parents would be disappointed in me. Sure, I am 23 years old and finally finished with school, but I couldn’t afford to pay rent, I wasn’t married and I had yet to land a steady “grown up” job. As far as my boyfriend went, I had given him a heads up a few days before that I was waiting for test results to come back so he wouldn’t be too surprised if I called to tell him he was going to be a dad, and luckily he didn’t seem too upset about the possibility. Because of this (and also because he helped make the baby), he was the first person I called.
Thousands of thoughts and scenarios played out in my head as I walked to my car and waited for him to answer his phone. What if he was just being polite the other day because he didn’t think a positive test result was even a remote possibility? What if it’s too much for him to accept and he hangs up on me? What if he acts like he’s okay with it at first, and then decides he isn’t ready to have a family of his own after all? What if he’s driving right now and gets into a car accident because the news is so shocking, and then I have to raise our baby alone? I was obviously losing my grip on reality, but there was no going back when I heard him say, “Hello?”
“Did your doctor call?”
“Yes… I’m pregnant.”
“Oh my God. Okay. Well. Are you okay?”
“Yes. I also got the job.”
And then he started laughing with happy disbelief in such a reassuring way that my worries instantly dissipated, and we had a relaxed, albeit exhilarating, conversation about how crazy this was, how we were obviously going to go through with the pregnancy and how I was going to tell my parents, and he his.
As I pulled up to my house, we ended the call with “I love yous,” I took a deep breath, made sure I didn’t have post-cry eye makeup all over my face and prepared myself for the inevitable news-sharing that was about to commence as soon as I walked in the door.
Here’s a useful piece of advice. If you ever have to tell your parents that they are about to be grandparents before your life is completely put together (but really, is it ever?), make sure you have some reassuring news to follow it up with.
My mom and I are super close, so it’s really no surprise that the first words out of my mouth as soon as I opened the door and made eye contact with her were, “I’m pregnant.”
Of course, she didn’t believe me. In fact, she laughed, and accused me of joking, which in turn made me burst into tears. Once she believed me, I reassured her that it was all going to be okay because I got the internship at my dream company, and there was a very big chance that I’d quickly move into a regular position. We then sat in silence for a minute as my mom gave me strange sideways glances. It was kind of awkward, but mostly a relief. She wasn’t yelling, crying or leaving the house in anger. Overall, the news-sharing was a success. Now I just had to tell my dad when he got home from work.
To give some background that might better explain my anxiety, once upon a time I was a rebellious high school student who liked to sneak cigarettes in the backyard. I never expected to get caught, but one day my dad came home from work early and I did. I tried to hide the cigarette by putting it out with fingers (bad, painful idea), but he knew what I was doing and was so unbelievably disappointed in me that it broke his heart, and thus my heart as well. Ever since then I’ve been terrified of disappointing him, so this day seven years later was a huge deal to me. My dad is a loving and accepting person, but I had no idea how he would react to news that his daughter had been impregnated.