I am not Paris Hilton. Clearly.
In fact, when not at The Heatley Cliff, I am an average, everyday lady. And what average, everyday lady does not dream of owning the Mount Everest of Purses? The Hope Diamond of Handbags? The Crown Jewels of Clutches?
I am talking about the Birkin Bag, of course. God, I want one. Bad. I know they are ridiculous and totally insanely expensive, made for people that live a far more glamorous life than I do. But late at night when I am lying in my bed, the moonlight spilling through the window, I hear its siren call. Then, I am inundated by the following sneaky little thoughts. Of course I would never, ever, ever listen… Though it is a beautiful song
- The Birkin Bag was inspired by the iconic actress, model, singer and uber chic Jane Birkin. Walking around with one of these little babies in the crook of my arm and some of her super coolness might rub off on me. I’d like to be Jane Birkin for a day, wouldn’t you?
- Hermes is the company that make the Birkin. They are French.
- The quality and the craftsmanship of these pieces are miraculous. They will last forever. Humans will become extinct. Ice Ages will come and go. Aliens will arrive and kick start evolution (again.) All that will remain of life as we know it today are cockroaches, possibly Martha Stewart and a stockpile of Birkin bags
- They hold things.
- Yes, of course they cost anywhere from $7,000 – $200,000 (yes that’s right, two hundred thousand dollars). But the bags do not depreciate in value. They don’t! It’s like real estate, but better. Both home and land prices are at the whim of the economy, but there is always some crazy person willing to pay a fortune for a Birkin. So basically, it’s an investment that I can wear. I could keep the money in the bank, but what if some type of terrorist plot happens and all computers are wiped out and all electronic information is lost? The Birkin could save my family from ruin.
- They are pretty.
- A single bag takes 48 hours to make by hand. It could be French people that make them or it could be magical elves. Considering the fervor and a the price that a single Birkin inspires, I believe there might be magic involved. Who knows what miraculous powers it could bestow upon me, its owner?
- No matter what color it is or type of leather, a Birkin goes with every outfit. I would never have to buy another bag as long as I lived. In doing this, I might actually save money.
- Victoria Beckham owns 100 Birkin Bags. ONE HUNDRED! So how can it possibly be a big deal for me to have just one?
- A Birkin Bag will never, ever go out of style. I will look just as chic 30 years from now as I would today. Sure people might judge me, call me frivolous or a poser. But probably not to my face.
Come on over the The Heatley Cliff this week and have a look at Hermes style.
Featured image via ninemsn/Glamour