When you go out to a dance club with your friends, it’s a known fact that you’ll check your musical taste at the door before entering. Clubs are notorious for playing a nonstop loop of auto-tuned, high-pitched, beat-thumping beats all night long until the lights come on and all of this is cool with me. I’m never there to discuss current events over a nice glass of chardonnay while Paul Simon whisper croons in the background.
I’m there because the dancefloor is calling my name.
People who don’t know me have no idea of this secret side of myself that I’m convinced I inherited from my mom who grew up dancing at discos, real discos, in the ‘70s. My girlfriends, on the other hand, are more than aware of my wilder side. Saturday nights in college, we would call each other up and decide to head to the nearest nightclub at 10pm. I would sadly look at my not even close to being finished homework for a minute and then quickly put on a shiny cute dress and get my lips super ruby red. At the club, we would then order drinks and over margaritas, I’d tell everyone some ridiculous true life story about some guy I thought was hot but I found some weird Twitter account of his online that they just had to hear about. We’d scope out the dancefloor in the meantime and by the time we were done with our drinks, it would be dancing time. Then followed by another bar visit, more dancing, more drinks, dancing, the bathroom, dancing, going outside for a breather, making random drunk friends, more drinks, and then oh damn, are the lights on already? That was fast!
On the dancefloor, all pounding music is created equal. The more you’ve had to drink, the more you find yourself shouting out, “This is my JAM! I love this song!” to something by Ke$ha. Incidentally, it was while I was at a club that I first heard about Ke$ha, her glitter on her eyes and stockings ripped all up the sides. Everything you normally have a complex against in the bright light of day feels just right in a sweaty room filled with dry ice machines and go-go dancers. No song is terrible if it makes you dance! Night clubs are a great way to get all caught up on your music videos, too. They’re the new MTV.
Without further ado, here are the 10 songs I shamelessly love to shake my tush to, whether in or out of the club.
1) Richard Vission & Static Avenger feat. Luciana – ‘I Like That’
My body rocks a rhythm, you beat my drum hard. There is just so much about this song to love. There’s a thump in it that makes you shimmy your hips, the lyrics make all the LA girls in the house throw up their hands and shout out loud, and it’s a short one. Stay in the bathroom for too long and you might miss it. BTW, I have had moments where I have been in the bathroom, heard a good song come on and danced my way out of the bathroom. Everyone does it at least once!
2) Paradiso Girls feat. Eve and Lil’ Jon - ‘Patron Tequila’
It’s the kind of song that would be right at home on an episode of Jersey Shore, what with lyrics that say “by the end of the night I’ll have you drunk and throwing up”, but don’t be fooled. While these ladies might sound like a lower-rent version of The Pussycat Dolls, it is also the unofficial song to raise a shot of Patron to. Okay, now I sound like I am one spray tan and a pair of UGGs from joining a shore boardwalk. Maybe the secret side of me you don’t know about is that I am secretly a raver. The club can’t even handle me right now.
This song also features Eve. Eve! Hello lady, it’s good to see you back up in the club again.
3) David Guetta feat. Tara McDonald – ‘Delirious’
I don’t know when it happened, but all of a sudden David Guetta became the man to look out for on the DJ roundtable. This song makes you want to do an interpretive dance every time Tara starts singing. You know, when the beat slows down and she says, “Seems to me like the days are getting longer”, my hands begin to reach up to some sort of invisible heavens and do something not quite like Vogue-ing, but we’re getting warmer.
4) Eric Prydz – ‘Call on Me’
If you have not heard this song yet, PUT IT ON. It’s very repetitive but stupidly catchy.
5) Cascada – ‘Evacuate the Dancefloor’
Normally my tolerance for Cascada is extremely low no matter what time of the day it is, but I can get behind this song. Just enough, though. I mostly just included it as an example of a great overplayed DJ essential that if you are sick of hearing it, you can use this song to go get some water, go use the bathroom, make friends outside in the smoker’s section, etc.
6) Martin Solveig feat. Dragonette – Hello’
This song is perfect to dance with a guy to because it’s got your greeting covered. Skip the awkward, “Hi, my name is” with “I just came to say hello! Hello!”
7) Deadmau5 – ‘Not Exactly’
Deadmau5 you either like or don’t but usually when I listen to them, I turn into a very different person, even moreso from the secret nightclub fan I just told you I am. Serious techno or house music has a way of filling me up inside and I kind of disappear inside of it. I make music videos with my mind. There’s a good reason why trance music is referred to as such and I am living proof it can really get under your skin, in the best possible way.
8) Madonna – ‘Ray of Light’
Did you really expect me to create this list without including the dance song that started it all for me? How could I not include William Orbit’s produced ‘Ray of Light’ with my favorite kind of Madonna, when she was a redhead and very into her spiritual side? Answer: I could never not. I will always dance to this song, whether it is playing from speakers or if I have to duck into an Abercrombie & Fitch and pretend I’m into the clothes there for it.
9) Estelle feat. Kanye West – ‘American Boy’ (Soulseekerz Club Remix)
Again, another classic to dance to with a guy. Bonus points if you get a hot one with a British accent and he switches up the lyrics to ‘American Girl’ to impress you. Slaphappy Heather likes that. I also approve of Aussie and Kiwi accents too.
10) Mark Ronson & The Business Intl. – ‘Bang Bang Bang’
This song is amazing. I adore Mark Ronson (even if he is married now and whatnot, he’s still a superfine stone fox) and I can’t tell you how many times I have repeated this song on my iPod. It’s probably well into the being played 15+ times a day mark. Slick, slick production and vocals.
*Honorable mention: Def Leppard – ‘Pour Some Sugar on Me’
We have all danced to this one and will continue to for the rest of our lives. It’s a classic.