That's Ba-Nanas

‘The Rachel Zoe Project’ Episode 8: Baby Changes Everything

There’s been a six week filming hiatus between episodes, during which time Rachel has given birth and claims to have taken maternity leave. Rach is headed back to work now, but she’s got a plan: “I’m just gonna take Sky with me everywhere.”

Today the team is shooting a look book for Rachel’s resort collection. Mandana’s a little freaked out that Rach won’t be fully present when she returns, but she seems to have everything utterly and completely under control. I would in a heartbeat give Mandana control over any aspect of my life. Girl gets the job done.

Rach shows up in her own sweet time, sans driver, plus two: baby Skylar and baby nurse Rusty.

“No offense to Rachel and Rodger, but I think Angelina Jolie wants her baby back,” Joey quips, referring to baby cuteness and also, I have to assume, the size of Sky’s lips.

Rach, like an actual human mother, seems much more concerned with feeding her baby than the photoshoot. Her team is not okay with this, but it’s the happiest and healthiest we’ve ever seen Rach. She even lets him drool on her resort collection while she bounces him. Clearly, Sky really is everything.

Side note: The clothes look MAJ.

Next, Jer has been called into the office by Mandana. It’s either ‘cause he’s required to be a cast member in every episode of TRZP or because they need him. Again. “The good news is, it’s not to fire me,” says Jer.

Turns out Bloomingdale’s is giving Rachel Zoe Inc. an audition for a store-in-store in LA and possibly elsewhere. Mandana wants Jer to do the job. “I can’t breathe,” he pants.

“Dude you can’t &*%$ this up,” is Mandana’s wise parting advice.

Once again, Jer hustles to furniture stores, appealing to the salespeople about creating a Parisian women’s dressing parlor. They know exactly what he’s talking about.

Back in parentingland, Rach sings Sky a sweet song about French fries and apple pies that doesn’t put him to sleep. Next, Rodge tries to tell him a story, ‘cause as far as anyone can tell, this is what they’re supposed to be doing as parents.

“That’s the worst story I’ve ever heard in my life,” says Rach, who proceeds to tell Sky a story about wearing beautiful designer clothes.

It’s time for Jer’s mock up meeting with Mandana. She immediately has a zil concerns about the functionality of Jer’s ideas. Now that he only has a few days left, it’s time to redo everything. Mandana is a pretty business-savvy chica, so I’m hoping he’s memorizing every word she says.

Back to baby. More shots of Rach and Rodge lounging with Skyer. And fighting over who spends the day with the baby.

Time to get dressed. And in the Zoe household that means, “He needs options. I feel like I need to bring a couple of options for him.”

“Your mommy’s cray cray,” whispers Rodge to Sky.

Going over the designer options for Sky’s wardrobe, the word maj is used about sixty-five times.

Jer, who’s stressing as usual about doing a huge job in extremely minimal time, is at Bloomie’s painting and constructing. He also starts stripping down, and I’m not sure how I haven’t mentioned this, but hello male model. Yeah, yeah, he’s not that tall. But, uh, look.


In comes the power trio, barreling down the aisles like fashion mafia. Rachel pushing Skyler, Rusty and Mandana looking like they’re gonna mess somebody up.

But after freaking out over one chair versus two, Rach deems Jer’s work a success.

But what really matters is what Bloomie’s thinks. And… they love it. Looks like Rach is getting eight store-in-stores and Jeremiah is crying.

Rach and Rodge have a chat about Jeremiah’s position at the company. During which, Rodge orders Rach to make him food, and complains when she’s distracted from the conversation by making him food. Rach looks like she’s gonna whack him good with some strawberry preserves.

Immaturity aside, they come to a consensus that Jeremiah should be hired permanently.

To wrap up the season, Rach and Rodge have everyone over for a BBQ. Rach makes a famous salami recipe which leads to inappropriate jokes that I won’t repeat. Rodge doesn’t seem to have the same culinary prowess, ‘cause while he claims, “I like to barbeque a certain way,” he needs Jer’s help to turn on his own grill.

Rodge and Rach tear up thanking everyone, and Rodge gives a big shout out to Jeremiah and asks him to join the company. Toasts all around. And with that, I’ll leave you with one last picture of Jeremiah with sweat, tears, metaphorical blood and disbelief all over his face.

Top photo from TV Guide. All other photos via BravoTV.

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